I'm back!

Being the type of person who feels guilty over anything and everything, I was feeling guilty for not blogging, espicially after seeing so many cool blogs out there. Not that mine is cool by any means, but I established this and figured what the hell.

I am still at Hunter Douglas, now at a new location, doing new things (mostly); I am in Roseville, and get this - I have a TITLE. Weird huh? No way do I feel I deserve it. I am the "Service Center Administrator". Not driving a new Cadillac Escalade or anything, but the benefits rock and I am happy. I have the benefit of a large company headquarters, but at a small location with only less than 10 employees - something I've always thought would be nice. No more stress like I had before in Customer Service (not that this is a cake walk, mind you); which is really nice for my Crohn's.

Speaking of Crohn's Disease, I am happy to report I am still in remission. I am hopeful that if I stay in remission long enough, the stem cell therapy I've read about will become available and I can get it.

John is still doing well at his job, and is happy, he got a 1999 Harley Davidson Fatboy in September and LOVES it. Plus, he looks really hot on it. :)

Mom and Dad went to Arizona for the winter and are thriving there, they really love going there and I am happy they have such a good time.

This weekend (I think), we're going to reinstall our laminate flooring. Good times.

Later!

So far, so good....?

So far so good - things seem stable at work (am I jinxing myself by saying that?)
For the most part I think I've got the basic functions down,  but I hate it when I make even the smallest mistake. We're moving to a different location (in Roseville, MN). Curious and slilghtly apprehensive about that.

I have a lot of things I'd like to talk about but can't. Not here.

Take care!

Return of April

Greetings!

Good news first:

Previously I mentioned Hunter Douglas coming in to shut down Warren Steven, and that most employees would be let go.

I was one of the VERY few who got to keep their job. I work in scheduling for installtions, measures and service calls. Stress level? NO comparison compared to what I was doing before. I enjoy working with Michelle, and so far, its all going well I think. I will officially have medical benefits next Thursday. (YAY!)

Bad News thus far for 2011:

Uncle Mikey died. Very very sad. :(

My sweet Cane Corso (Italian Mastiff) Rommy died on March 25th. He was nearly 8 years old. He wasn't ill, or  injured. The day prior, he slipped and fell on our lower deck, but got up and came in.  The following morning, he slipped and fell again, but could not / refused to get up again.  John and I got him in the lower patio door, (he weighed over 160 pounds), layed him down on the floor, gave him some love, some pets and some cuddles. We thought he maybe pulled a muscle or something, and was a little shook up / scared about what happened. I let Katie downstairs to see him, then I gave him some rub-rubs, cuddles, told him I loved him and went to work. 1 hour later, after I got to work, my sweet Rommy bear crossed the rainbow bridge. I miss him every hour of every day. But I know he is happy and having a good time over on the other side and I'll see him again someday.

Love to you all,
April

Happy New Year, Happy Birthday!

Welcome to 2011!

I can honestly say 2010 was a very tough year, and I am hoping that 2011 is way better.

Today is my birthday. I am actually starting to feel OLD.It sucks! 

John got me the following: 

Fringe Season 2 DVD
Glee Season 1 DVD
Pepsi - tee-shirt
Design Perfume (that comes w/a little bottle for my purse)
Intuition razor/bath set -mucho cool!
Oreo mousse birthday cake
Oreo ice cream
Birthday card that made my throat cry

From Jeanette:
Boston Terrier figurine
30 bucks cash

From Mom & Dad
Toy Story 3 DVD - (I really wanted this!)

In other news...

1st - our garage door opener bit the dust. What a pain in the ass.
2nd - found out that Hunter Douglas is going to come in and shut down Warren Steven - with the slight possibility that they'll keep some of the employees - damn I hope so. I can't be without insurance

I had  a fantastic new years eve with John.

Positive thoughts for the new year

much love,
April

Holiday Loot!

Happy Holidays!

Hope you all got what you wanted from Santa! Here is my list of loot received:

Bones Season 5 (most desired item I might add)
Supernatural Season 5
Design Perfume  (my signature scent, which I was wearing on my 1st date w/John and on the day we got married)
Capricorn One DVD
Black fleece jammie pants w/white shirt
2 pair of purple fuzzy socks
Vanilla jasmine bath set
Lavendar vanilla bath set
Elvis Presley calendar
2 stockings full of every kind of chocolate imagineable
Boston Terrier socks
Rainbow socks
Fabrige egg pendant
20.00 target gift card
10.00 target gift card
Vanilla candle set
Banana coconut shampoo/conditioner, lotion, spray, and body wash
Reindeer blend whole bean Caribou Coffee
Nine West purple wallet (that matches my nine west purple purse!)


John's Loot (afterall,this is the OSBOURNE blog, not just April's)

Star Wars: The Clone Wars season 1
Star Wars: The Clone Wars season 2
2 star wars tee-shirts
2 star wars action figures (he's a collector)
1 star wars battle scene
Knife set
Nivea body wash/shave/shampoo
2 sets of socks
Grey sweatshirt/pullover
Maroon soft sweater
Turtles made with Cashews
Turtles made with Pecans
Chiltons 1996 Ford F150 manual
Lindor Truffles
Black fleece lounge pants
Ear buds for iPod

not a bad haul huh? :)

Getting Married in Las Vegas

I got married in Las Vegas in April of 1997.

When John and I were 1st planning on getting married, we went to the church I went to from the time I was 4 to talk to my pastor, and to begin making plans. I went and was fitted for a custom wedding dress, chose invitations, all that stuff you do to plan a wedding. As I was doing this, 2 things occurred to me. #1. Its expensive (obviously) and #2. it seems like a lot of the things you do is more about everyone else than about the event itself, which is about you and the person you’re marrying.
So I took my Mom and Dad’s advise and began looking into getting married in Las Vegas. It seemed a lot more adventurous, and more about John and I than everyone else, which is sort of how I feel its suppose to be.
John and I got married at “Las Vegas Wedding Gardens”, and we stayed at The Riviera Hotel & Casino. I still think of the time we had there fondly, and I hope that the Riviera is there for a while because it would mean a lot to me to be able to stay there again and re-experience memories with John, and create new ones.

He's A Rebel

See the way he walks down the street


Watch the way he shuffles his feet

My, he holds his head up high

When he goes walking by

He's my guy
When he holds my hand, I'm so proud

'Cause he's not just one of the crowd

My baby's always the one

To try the things they've never done

And just because of that, they say

He's a rebel and he'll never ever be any good

He's a rebel 'cause he never ever does what he should

But just because he doesn't do what everybody else does,

That's no reason why I can't give him all my love

He's always good to me,

Always treats me tenderly

'Cause he's not a rebel, oh no no no

He's not a rebel, oh no no no, to me


 If they don't like him that way,

They won't like me after today

And I'll be standing right by his side when they say


He's a rebel and he'll never ever be any good

He's a rebel 'cause he never ever does what he should

But just because he doesn't do what everybody else does,

That's no reason why we can't share a love

He's always good to me

Good to him, I try to be

'Cause he's not a rebel, oh no no no

He's not a rebel, oh no no no, to me

where the heck have I been?!

1st let me apologize, I know I have millions of readers out there wondering where the hell I am, I am constantly being barraged with complaints I don't blog enough. ;)

In late October I was diagnosed with severe Endometriosis - numerous fibrioids, one the size of a baseball. So surgery of a hysterectomy was scheduled on November 15th. Okay, so that has been complete, and I am feeling fine, and am back to work - so all is well with the world again. No worries. 

Mom and Dad are going to more "officially" retire and begin to live their dream, to travel the USA and have Minnesota as their "home base". Right after Christmas, (literally, December 26th) they begin their journey, starting at Arizona, and then moving on to Nevada. Not sure where they will end up next, but they are apprehensively excited. I am happy they are able to do this. 

Crohn's wise all is well. Very strong remission. (knock on wood)

I am no longer on speaking terms with my younger sister and her family, Rachel. I miss the person she was, and wish her the best, which I do mean truely.

Unfortunatley, because of some of the choices she has made and the actions she has responded with, not only do I forsee her life being more difficult than it needs to be, but as a direct result so will Kathryn's, and thus Tylers. Hind sight is 20/20 though and often we don't see our mistakes until its way too late to remedy them. I hope I am wrong, but I don't  think I am. I am not the only one who sees this and thinks this way. Several family members agree. Maybe someday she will be someone I am able to associate with again.

During the past stressful year, one thing as become clear, I have married the best man on earth. He has stood by me, supported me, loved me and done everything in his power to insure my happiness, health, and love. I don't even want to imagine my life without him, for I would surely be lost. Love you John.

peace, out!

April the bad blogger

I know you've all been waiting breathlessly for me to update my blog ....(pause for wild applause), so here I am. Updating.

John as of now is still unemployed, driving me crazy. AT least he empties the dishwasher now though. THAT is a major improvement. :)

We also have added a new animal to our family.

White kitten named Kashmir.

Sounds so cute, so sweet, so cuddly, right.

Wrong.

She is the kitten from HELL.

She was born on April 1st. Named her Kashmir from the Led Zepplin song. (love that song)

man - she LOVES  to bite. We had to go out and purchase squirt guns (a 6 pack), and place them stragecially throughout the house. In an effort to get her to stop biting fingers, toes, anything her mouth can get on, biting Katie, biting Rommy, biting the iguana's tail, getting into the plants, climbing the screen door, etc. There is about an hour or 2 a day where she IS cute, fluffy, purry, cuddly kitty, the the other 90% of the time, she is a little shit. Hoping she calms down...soon.

In other news (I love saying that), John has a job interview on Wednesday. I am now soliciting prayers from everyone I know. (wink, nudge). IF he gets a new job, we can refinance the house, and at some point get a new car. My 2001 Ford Explorer has 204,000 miles on it. Dad retired from Ford, so I get a nice discount. We're thinking of a Fiesta or a Focus. I'd love a Fusion, but they're a little pricey.

So thats whats new and shaking in my world. I am on "vacation" this week. Yes. I have a to-do list.

Here it is:

Shampoo Carpet (done today)
Scrub Kitchen Floor (did yesterday)
Scrub Entry Floor
Scrub Bathroom Floor (done)
Scrub walls in hallway, bathroom, bedroom (1/2 done)
Clean  the windows 
Organize under bathroom cabinet (done)
Organize hall closet (done)
Change bedding (done)
Clean and change hummingbird feeder (done)
Dust (done)
Clean the fish tanks
Clean the computer desk (Done)

I also mowed the front lawn, weeded the front garden, pulled weeds in the back yard, cleaned & filled the bird bath, filled the bird feeder, cleaned the deck, took the dogs for their 7 mile walk (twice now). 

I did sit still at some point and watched the Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi, and Toy Story. (also went to see Toy Story 3 in the theater, yes, I cried).

Talk to you all soon!
XXOO

April

'Economic Stimulus'

Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment.



This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format:



Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.



Q. Where will the government get this money ?

A. From taxpayers.



Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?

A. Only a smidgen of it.



Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.



Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. Shut up and watch your mouth.



Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:





* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China or Sri Lanka .



* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.



* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India, Taiwan, or China .





* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala ..



* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea .



* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .



* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.



Instead, keep the money in America by:



1) Spending it at yard sales, or



2) Going to ball games, or



3) Spending it on prostitutes, or



4) Beer or



5) Tattoos.



(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )



Conclusion:



Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day !



No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.

Important Rules

Rule 1: Life is not fair - get used to it!




Rule 2: The world doesn't care about your self-esteem.

The world will expect you to accomplish something

BEFORE you feel good about yourself.



Rule 3: You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school.

You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.



Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.



Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity.

Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping:

they called it opportunity.



Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault,

so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.



Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they



are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes

and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before

you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try

delousing the closet in your own room.



Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life



HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they'll

give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This

doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.



Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and



very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF.

Do that on your own time.



Rule 10: Television is NOT real life..

In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs..



Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.

UNIVERSAL LAWS

\
1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After our hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.
2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
3. Law of Probability -The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act
4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.
5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire..
6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).
7. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.
8. Law of Close Encounters -The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
10. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. 11.. Law of the Theater and Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies, and stay to the bitter end of the performance..The aisle people also are very surly folk.
12. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
13. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
14. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.
15... Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.
17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.
18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.
19. Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment, and you'll stay sick.

Did You Know That These Famous People Have/Had Crohns Disease?

Shannen Doherty, actress, has Crohn’s Disease. She has been battling the ailment for years. She will be on Dancing with the Stars this month.



Dwight D. Eisenhower, 34th president of the United States suffered from Crohn’s disease and underwent an emergency resection in 1956 while in office.



David Garrard, the Jacksonville Jaguars quarterback was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in March of 2004.



Mike McCready, lead guitarist of Pearl Jam was diagnosed with Crohn’s at the age of 21.



Rolando McClain, a college football player & NFL draft prospect recently revealed he has Crohn’s. Read about him here http://bit.ly/9UloRU



Anastacia, the American born singer and song writer, was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease at the age of 13. Anastacia has sold over 25 million albums worldwide.



Mary Ann Mobley, crowned Miss America in 1959, was diagnosed in her early 20’s with Crohn’s disease. She starred in sever films with Elvis Presley. She is also the co-chairwoman of the Celebrity Club of the Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation of America.



These are just a few. If you do a web search you will find many more.



Love, Laugh, and always know where the nearest bathroom is

Words of Wisdom

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone.




2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.



3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.



5. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.



7. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.



8. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.



9. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.



10. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.



11. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.



12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.



13. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.



14. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.



15. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.



16. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.



17. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.



18. A closed mouth gathers no foot.



19. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.



20. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.



21. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.



22. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.



23. Never miss a good chance to shut up.



24. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

BITCHOLOGY

BITCHOLOGY




When I stand up for myself and my beliefs, they call me a bitch.



When I stand up for those I love, they call me a bitch.



When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do things my own way, they call me a bitch.



Being a bitch means I won’t compromise what’s in my heart



It means I live my life MY way.



It means I won't allow anyone to step on me.



When I refuse to tolerate injustice and speak against it, I am defined as a bitch.



The same thing happens when I take time for myself instead of being everyone's maid, or when I act

a little selfish.



It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be who I truly am and won't become anyone else's idea of what they think I 'should' be....



I am outspoken, opinionated and determined.



I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that!



So try to stomp on me, just try to douse my inner flame, try to squash every ounce of beauty I hold within me.



You won't succeed.



And if that makes me a bitch , so be it.



I embrace the title and am proud to bear it.



B - Babe

I - In

T - Total

C - Control of

H – Herself



B = Beautiful

I = Intelligent

T = Talented

C = Charming

H = Hell of a Woman



B = Beautiful

I = Individual

T = That

C = Can

H = Handle 'anything'

Pick Me Up On Your Way Down

When my sister Rachel and I were little, her favorite song was this old country song by Charlie Walker, “Pick Me Up On Your Way Down” – every time I hear the song now, (its on my iPod), I think of her, and have it as my ring tone for when she calls me on my cell phone. The lyrics really tell a story, and in some ways matches the life Rachel has led.






You were mine for just a while,

now you're puttin' on the style

And you've never once looked back,

to your home across the track

You're the gossip of the town,

but my heart can still be found

Where you tossed it on the ground

pick me up on your way down



Pick me up on your way down,

when you're blue and all alone

When their glamour starts to bore you,

come on back where you belong



You may be their pride and joy

But they’ll find another toy

Then they’ll take away your crown

Pick me up on your way down



They have changed your attitude,

made you haughty and so rude

Your new friends can take the blame,

underneath you're still the same



When you've learned these things are true,

I'll be waiting here for you

When you tumble to the ground,

pick me up on your way down

The Animal Rescue Site

The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily so they can meet their quota of getting FREE FOOD donated every day to abused and neglected animals. It takes less than a minute (about 15 seconds) to go to their site and click on the purple box ‘fund food for animals for free.’ This doesn’t cost you a thing.



Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising. Here’s the web site!



http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/

Bad Blogger!

Greetings & Salutations!

I've realized as of late I've been a bad blog owner, as I've not been posting much.

I've been distracted.

Day before Christmas Eve, my husband John was layed off work. Because unemployment still hasn't finished "investigating" his file - he was on a long term contract with a temporary company, evidently that throws up red flags with Minnesota Unemployment people - thus no funds received from them. At one point, I had 10 bucks in my checking account, and was forced to activate a credit card I had promised I was only keeping for emergencies. However, its expected to be done being investigated on January 15th. Which is also the day I get paid (my hours have been cut to 32 hours by the way).

I've begun to apply for a 2nd job, while looking for jobs for John on the internet, and cold emailing out his resume. (why isn't he doing it? he isn't as technologically advanced as I am, heh)

Insert acute depression, anxiety and panic.

All of the above is the reasons I've not blogged. (put have done a lot of praying...)

as soon as things start looking up, I'll blog more.

.....

Elvis Presley - will always be my first, my last, my favorite.

Misha Collins - Crush # 4 - newest addition!

David Boreanaz - Crush # 3

Jensen Ackles - Crush # 2

Luke Perry - crush #1

Celebrity Crushes

My list of celebrity crushes has always been the following - starting with the 1st, working my way to the most recent.

1. Luke Perry - Loved that total bad ass Dylan McKay. He resembes my husband John slightly, and that husky, raspy voice? Oh yeah.

2. Jensen Ackles - Found him when I was a Dark Angel fan - he played Alec. Loved the way that hot bar code looked on the back of his neck. I suffered through Dawsons Creek, just to see him, then he was on Smallville, so of course I followed him there. Now he is on Supernatural as Dean. Love his sense of humor, although I loved his sense of humor on Dark Angel as Alec more.

3. Recent addition to the list - David Boreanaz, I developed a crush on him when I started watching Bones. I never planned on watching Bones, I might add, however my niece insisted I watch it, so we could "Talk about it together" - (which we never did by the way). Ironically, he resembles my ex boyfriend, Mark. When he was on Buffy and Angel, I never thought he was much to write home about - but I never watched those shows, I think because they were both on at the same time as something else I was watching. I didn't get the "hots" for him so to speak until he started playing Seeley Booth. Up until recently, he was my NUMBER one celeb crush (sorry Luke & Jensen)

4. Shocking, new celeb crush? Misha Collins. Wow. I so love his character Castiel on Supernatural. Those eyes? That mouth. His dramatic whispery voice, and entrances. (swoons).  I have actually sought out pictures of him on the internet, and found some AWESOME ones. (I'll post one for your viewing pleasure)

5. The one person who will ALWAYS be my number one crush though? Elvis Presley. Always.

The 46 Stages of Twitter

1. Hear the word Twitter. Scoff.

2. Hear it again from someone else. Scoff again.

3. Hear about famous celebrity who is apparently "On Twitter." Scoff, but make mental note to check it out.

4. Log into Facebook to comfort self.

5. Sign up for Twitter.

6. Give up because it seems dumb.

7. Loudly criticize others on Twitter.

8. Follow @johncmayer, @aplusk, @rainnwilson, @wilw, @mrskutcher, @oprah, and one other person you actually know.

9. Post tweet that is a variant of: "Trying out this Twitter thing."

10. Attempt to dig a little deeper into Twitter.

11. Notice rampant usage of words: "Tweet," "Twitter," "Twitterverse," "Tweetie," "Tweetdeck," and something called "RT."

12. Scoff again, this time in confusion.

13. Tell friends you "tried that Twitter thing, but didn't get it and it's stupid anyway."

14. Log into Facebook because that site at least makes sense.

15. Read story about Twitter somewhere.

16. Log back into Twitter.

17. Try to avoid saying Tweet, Twitter, Twitterverse, Tweetie, Tweetdeck, and ReTweet.

18. Respond to @rainnwilson.

19. Curse self for fanning out.

20. Log off for 4 months.

21. Come back, just to see.

22. Post something relatively funny.

23. Get RT'd.

24. Discover that RT means ReTweet.

25. Make it your life mission to get RT'd.

26. Install Twitter app on your phone.

27. No longer ashamed to say "I've gotta Twitter that."

28. Attend events with the sole intention of "Tweeting" them.

29. Pray to get RT'd.

30. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh.

31. Close computer.

32. Open computer. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh.

33. Think in 140 character sentences.

34. Compulsively check phone all day every day.

35. Tweet that you compulsively check phone all day every day.

36. Alienate actual people in your life in an attempt to impress ones you don't know.

37. Lose weight because you forget to eat.

38. Place phone by bed so you can check first thing in the morning.

39. Defend Twitter to the death from detractors.

40. Hear self, and vaguely recognize that you have become "That Guy."

41. Feel like, and start to behave like River Tam.

42. Vow to quit Twitter to preserve sanity.

43. Read this and change mind.

44. Think to self, "I should twitter that."

45. Recognize irony.

46. Twitter it.

Vacation to do list follow up post

Well....

I am proud to report that I got 95% of the to do list done.

Tomorrow is my last day of "vacation".

The following items did not get done:

Clean back yard, under deck
Clean silhouettes
Wash Eddie
Wash Camaro
Rommy bath
Paint hallway
Paint bathroom

Rommy bath and Silhouette thing still might happen. Not today though. Perhaps tomorrow.

Tomorrow at 12:30 I have to go get a Remicade infusion. (intravenious drug that helps shut off my Crohn's Disease). So tomorrow is probably out for the balance of the list. 

I had a feeling that those things were not going to happen anyway - they are the more yucky items.

on another note.....season premiere of Bones is almost upon us!

Vacation

I am off work from Friday, September 4th - Wednesday Septbember 9th. Since John and I have no money to go anywhere or do anything, here is my to do list:

Vacation To-Do List:




Scrub all woodwork

Scrub entryway floor

Scrub bathroom floor

Scrub kitchen floor

Clean leather furniture

Clean back yard, under deck

Clean mouse house

Clean silhouettes

Clean fish tank

Clean windows

Wash Eddie

Wash Camaro

Clean bathroom

Dust

Organize hall closet

Organize entryway closet

Organize bedroom closets

Organize hallway closet

Organize under kitchen sink

Organize under bathroom sink

Organize computer desk

Rommy bath

Paint hallway

Paint bathroom

Clean refridgerator

Clean stainless steel

Clean on top of refridgerator

Water plants

Clean snake cage

 

Thinking.....

Ya know, its tough to sometimes supress my inner smart ass.


Too often I'll be at work, at home, in the car observing other drivers & people, or just out in the world, and so MANY smart alecky thoughts and/or actions I'd like to do run through my mind.
My Grandma Maty use to say that it was a good thing she didn't always do or say what she was thinking, and when I was younger, I didn't understand what she meant at all.

That feeling must be genetic. I know EXACTLY what she means.

As I consider that last statement, I take that back. I KNOW its genetic. Because if I am out in the world, as I described above, and my sister Rachel is with me, all it takes is one look exchanged between us, and there is at least a 85% chance she knows exactly what I am thinking, and the same thought had occurred to her as well.

(which is why when we worked at the same company together for a few years, they had to separate us, we use to get into too much trouble)

Helping, and accepting help

It makes me so happy to be able to help people.

Helping people in big ways, small ways, just that overwhelming feeling of knowing that I made a difference, big or small, its just an indescribable feeling.

I wish I could be one of the few who are able to work with people in say, a hospital, nursing home, or anything in the medical field, but I just can't. I'd get too attached to the person and it just wouldn't be a good situation. Plus, I'd always be worried I was hurting them in some way. I admire people in this field.

So why is it, that I love helping people so much, I am so unable to ask for help or accept help myself, without enormous feelings of guilt?

I like to feel like I can manage things on my own. I don't want to have to turn to someone and say:

I need some help.

Poem I wrote when I had to put my 1st Boston Terrier, Katie to sleep

Your favorite chair is vacant now

No eager woof to greet me

No little paws to run

Excitedly to meet me

No playful bark, no little cry

Will say it’s time for playing,

I have put away your bowl,

And other toys you won’t be needing.
But I will miss you little friend,

For I could never measure,

The happiness you have brought to me,

The comfort and the pleasure.

And since god sent you here,

In earthly joy and sorrow,

I am sure there is a place for you in heavens bright tomorrow.

Never Be This Young Again

They've called the last dance of the evenin'.


It's the one dance that we call our own.

Most of the others are leavin' and headin' on home

To cryin' goodbye of the fiddles.

The sweetest of love songs must end,

So I'll dance this one with you, just like I first met you.

We'll never be this young again.



We'll never be this young again.

Never be this young again.

Why sit and dream about what might have been?

Yesterday's promise has died on the wind,

So hold me tonight like you held me back then.

We'll never be this young again.



This is the same song we dance to

Back when all our tomorrows were bright.

Now darlin', we have the chance to relive 'em tonight.

Why talk of the years that we've wasted

Or places that we've never been?

Just dance this one with me like you first met me.

We'll never be this young again.



We'll never be this young again

Never be this young again.

Why sit and dream about what might have been?

If we could do it over, we'd do it again,

And I love you tonight like I loved you back then.

We'll never be this young again.

we call our own.

Most of the others are leavin' and headin' on home

To cryin' goodbye of the fiddles.

The sweetest of love songs must end,

So I'll dance this one with you, just like I first met you.

We'll never be this young again.



We'll never be this young again.

Never be this young again.

Why sit and dream about what might have been?

Yesterday's promise has died on the wind,

So hold me tonight like you held me back then.

We'll never be this young again.



This is the same song we dance to

Back when all our tomorrows were bright.

Now darlin', we have the chance to relive 'em tonight.

Why talk of the years that we've wasted

Or places that we've never been?

Just dance this one with me like you first met me.

We'll never be this young again.



We'll never be this young again

Never be this young again.

Why sit and dream about what might have been?

If we could do it over, we'd do it again,

And I love you tonight like I loved you back then.

We'll never be this young again.

Skinny & Ugly or Fat & Pretty

I had this posted on my blog previously, and its such a hilarious story, I had to post it again.




A while back, my sister Rachel and I were having a conversation with Kathryn, my niece (Rachels daughter, who is now 15).



I asked them both, if they'd rather be skinny & ugly or fat and pretty.



Rachel and I both agreed that we'd both rather be fat & pretty. Probably thinking it would be easier to loose weight and still have the prettiness factor to work in our favor.



Kathryn disagreed, saying that she'd rather be skinny and ugly, because : "Hair and makeup can do a lot"



I smile everytime I think about it.

Rindercella

Story of Rindercella Once apon a time, in a coreign fountry, there lived a very geautiful birl; her name was Rindercella. Now, Rindercella lived with her mugly other and her two sad bisters. And in this same coreign fountry, there was a very prandsom hince.




And this prandsom hince was going to have a bancy fall. And he'd invited people from riles amound, especially the pich reople. Rindercella's mugly other and her two sad blisters went out to buy some drancy fesses to wear to this bancy fall, but Rindercella could not go because all she had to wear were some old rirty dags. Finally, the night of the bancy fall arrived and Rindercella couldn't go. So she just cat down and scried. She was a kitten there a scrien, when all at once there appeard before her, her gairy fodmother. And he touched her with his wagic mand ... and there appeared before her, a cig boach and hix white sorces to take her to the bancy fall. But now she said to Rindercella, "Rindercella, you must be home before nidmight, or I'll purn you into a tumpkin!"



When Rindercella arrived at the bancy fall, the prandsom hince met her at the door because he had been watchin' behind a woden hindow. And Rindercella and the prandsom hince nanced all dight until nidmight...and they lell in fove. And finally, the mid clock strucknight. And Rindercella staced down the rairs, and just as she beached the rottom, she slopped her dripper!



The next day, the prandsom hince went all over the coreign fountry looking for the geautiful birl who had slopped her dripper. Finally he came to Rindercella's house. He tried it on Rendercella's mugly other ... and it fidn't dit. Then he tried it on her two sigly usters ... and it fidn't dit. Then he tried it on Rindercella ... and it fid dit. It was exactly the sight rize!



So they were married and lived heverly ever hapwards. Now, the storal of the mory is this: If you ever go to a bancy fall and want to have a pransom hince loll in fove with you, don't forget to slop your dripper!

Mental Health Hotline

Answering Service


This is the transcript of the new answering service recently installed at the Mental Health Institute.



Hello and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline.



If you are obsessive-compulsive: Press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent: Ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities: Press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid: We know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional: Press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic: Listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive: It doesn't matter what number you press - no-one will answer.

If you are dyslexic: Press 969696969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder: Please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia: Press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.

If you have short-term memory loss: Press 9.

If you have short-term memory loss: Press 9.

If you have short-term memory loss: Press 9. If you have short term memory loss: Press 9.

If you have low self esteem: Please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.

Best Rum Cake Ever

Best Rum Cake Ever




Ingredients:

1 C butter 1 tsp baking soda

1 C sugar 1 tsp salt

4 large eggs lemon juice

1 C dried fruit 1 C brown sugar

1 tsp baking powder nuts

1 or 2 quarts rum



Before you start, sample the rum to check for quality. (Pretty good, huh?) Now go ahead.



Select a large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc. Check rum again as it must be just right. To be sure the rum is of the finest quality, pour one level cup into a glass and drink it as fast as you can. Repeat, if needed.



With an electric mixer, beat 1 C of the butter in a large fluffy bowl and add 1 teaspoon of thugar and beat again.



Meanwhile, make sure that the rum is of the finest quality. Cry anuther tup. Open second quart, if necessary.



Add 2 arge eggs. 2 cups fried druit and beat til high. If druit get stuck in beaters, just pry loose witha drewsciver



Sample rum again to check for tonscisticity



Next, sift 3 cups od salt oar anythink. it really doesn't matter. Sample the rlum.



Sift half pint of lemon juice. Fold in chopped butter and strained nuts. Add 1 babblespoon of brown thugar, or whatever color you can find, and mix mell. Grease over an turn cake pan to 350 gredees.



Now poor the whole mess into the boven and ake.



Check the rum again and bo to ged.

Prayers Answered!

I won't have to go to the food shelf!

Jeanette, my mother in law, (who rents the lower portion of our house), gave us $100.00 to help in the repair cost of my truck.

THANK YOU.

August 26

Well friends,

Many of you know John was laid off around Memorial Day, and thankfully, he is getting unemployment, which is a LIFESAVER.  He is in sort of a specialized field, which depends on the construction industry. (He is a finisher/industrial sprayer).

He has been officially called back to work around the 2-3rd week in September.

Meanwhile, I've maxed out my line of credit with Wells Fargo (except for 300 bucks as a emergency cusion); my truck needs a repair that, THANK GOD my Uncle can take care of, instead of having to go the garage; every week when payday rolls around, I am hoping for an extra few bucks so John and I can go out on a date or do something, but usually wind up with JUST enough, to tide us over until next payday.

The Minnesota State Fair is starting and I'd give anything to go, I want a pronto pup, some cheese curds, some mini doughnuts, maybe some other crap food on a stick. No funds for it this year. 

Because I have Crohn's disease, I have to try and watch my stress levels, because stress can really kick it into high gear.  I really don't want to, but I am seriously considering seeing a 2nd form of employment, primarily, because I am going to have to visit the food shelf this week, as we don't have quite enough for all th grocerys we need, espicially if my Uncle is going to fix my truck Monday of next week. Which is going to be an extra 150-200 bucks.

I know my body probably can't take on the stress a 2nd job would create, but neither can it afford the stress of mounting unpaid bills. 

I try to stay positive, to remember that there's a brand new day on the horizon, but even I get to have a bad attitude somedays. Today is my day to be negative.

thanks for listening!

We're back baby!

I decided to re-instate Land of Osbourne.

I had this as a blog a few years ago and dropped it.

I've found...oddly enough that I missed it.

So...this is my first post of a brand new blog.

Welcome back readers of Land of Osbourne!

-April