Land of Osbourne

\ 1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After our hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee. 2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. 3. Law of Probability -The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act 4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers. 5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.. 6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time). 7. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings. 8. Law of Close Encounters -The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with...

Shannen Doherty, actress, has Crohn’s Disease. She has been battling the ailment for years. She will be on Dancing with the Stars this month. Dwight D. Eisenhower, 34th president of the United States suffered from Crohn’s disease and underwent an emergency resection in 1956 while in office. David Garrard, the Jacksonville Jaguars quarterback was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease in March of 2004. Mike McCready, lead guitarist of Pearl Jam was diagnosed with Crohn’s at the age of 21. Rolando McClain, a college football player & NFL draft prospect recently revealed he has Crohn’s. Read about him here http://bit.ly/9UloRU Anastacia, the American born singer and song writer, was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease at the age of 13. Anastacia has sold over 25 million albums worldwide. Mary Ann Mobley, crowned Miss America in 1959, was diagnosed in her early 20’s with Crohn’s disease. She starred in sever films with Elvis Presley. She is also the co-chairwoman of the Cele...

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone. 2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire. 3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it. 5. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted. 7. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else. 8. Never test the depth of the water with both feet. 9. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments. 10. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes. 11. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. 12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to...

BITCHOLOGY When I stand up for myself and my beliefs, they call me a bitch. When I stand up for those I love, they call me a bitch. When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or do things my own way, they call me a bitch. Being a bitch means I won’t compromise what’s in my heart It means I live my life MY way. It means I won't allow anyone to step on me. When I refuse to tolerate injustice and speak against it, I am defined as a bitch. The same thing happens when I take time for myself instead of being everyone's maid, or when I act a little selfish. It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be who I truly am and won't become anyone else's idea of what they think I 'should' be.... I am outspoken, opinionated and determined. I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that! So try to stomp on me, just try to douse my inner flame, try to squash every ounce of beauty I hold within me. ...

When my sister Rachel and I were little, her favorite song was this old country song by Charlie Walker, “Pick Me Up On Your Way Down” – every time I hear the song now, (its on my iPod), I think of her, and have it as my ring tone for when she calls me on my cell phone. The lyrics really tell a story, and in some ways matches the life Rachel has led. You were mine for just a while, now you're puttin' on the style And you've never once looked back, to your home across the track You're the gossip of the town, but my heart can still be found Where you tossed it on the ground pick me up on your way down Pick me up on your way down, when you're blue and all alone When their glamour starts to bore you, come on back where you belong You may be their pride and joy But they’ll find another toy Then they’ll take away your crown Pick me up on your way down They have changed your attitude, made you haughty and so rude Your new fri...

The Animal Rescue Site is having trouble getting enough people to click on it daily so they can meet their quota of getting FREE FOOD donated every day to abused and neglected animals. It takes less than a minute (about 15 seconds) to go to their site and click on the purple box ‘fund food for animals for free.’ This doesn’t cost you a thing. Their corporate sponsors/advertisers use the number of daily visits to donate food to abandoned/neglected animals in exchange for advertising. Here’s the web site! http://www.theanimalrescuesite.com/

Greetings & Salutations! I've realized as of late I've been a bad blog owner, as I've not been posting much. I've been distracted. Day before Christmas Eve, my husband John was layed off work. Because unemployment still hasn't finished "investigating" his file - he was on a long term contract with a temporary company, evidently that throws up red flags with Minnesota Unemployment people - thus no funds received from them. At one point, I had 10 bucks in my checking account, and was forced to activate a credit card I had promised I was only keeping for emergencies. However, its expected to be done being investigated on January 15th. Which is also the day I get paid (my hours have been cut to 32 hours by the way). I've begun to apply for a 2nd job, while looking for jobs for John on the internet, and cold emailing out his resume. (why isn't he doing it? he isn't as technologically advanced as I am, heh) Insert acute depression, anxi...