Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Seeing things from both sides

Recently, I was asked an innocent enough question  - I've probably been asked it before and I know what my answer was previously, but now my answer was different and it has really made me think a lot the last few days.

I use to work in a customer service type atmosphere, where I was a part of a group of people, all working towards a common purpose, led by a supervisor or two.  Some people in that group excelling more than others, but each contributing.  Looking back, this type of setting definitely has it benefits.   A smaller privately owned company, maybe not as good pay or benefits.

I now work as an office administrator, where the dynamic is a lot different. While the company I work for now is very very large, with smaller offices throughout the United States (and world, for that matter); So I have the benefit of a large company, thus meaning good pay and benefits.

I am very thankful for my job. I know that I am good at what I do. (not perfect, I am human, I am gonna screw stuff up from time to time). I know that I am appreciated.

I was asked by my new Psychologist if I like my job. I don't know why it took me by surprise the way it did, because as I said, I've been asked it before, and I know the answer I gave, and nothing really has changed, at least I don't think it has. But you know what? I don't particularly like it. I don't hate it, just to clarify.

Like I said, I've really been thinking a lot about this statement.  Why I answered and feel as I do. I think its because there is so much more pressure to be the "administrator" who is in charge of running an office, versus being one of a group of people, thus less pressure.

I am a loner by nature. Sometimes its really hard to force myself to be social and do all the things that social people do.  Sometimes its hard to pretend to be someone I am not.

Ideally, I think my dream job would be to do something involving computers with not a lot of human interaction. However since I did not go to college and probably won't have that opportunity to do so in the forseeable future, I am going to stick with what I am good at, and be grateful for what I have.


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